text_original: If you have ever been fortunate enough to find yourself minus a fair sized skylight on a stormy night, and the man of the house away on urgent business, and not expected back for a month, you will know what my feelings were when I heard the news. It is useless for me to try to describe them.
text_transcription: IF YOU HAVE EVER BEEN FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO FIND YOURSELF MINUS A FAIR SIZED SKYLIGHT ON A STORMY NIGHT AND THE MAN OF THE HOUSE AWAY ON URGENT BUSINESS AND NOT EXPECTED BACK FOR A MONTH YOU WILL KNOW WHAT MY FEELINGS WERE WHEN I HEARD THE NEWS IT IS USELESS FOR ME TO TRY TO DESCRIBE THEM
phonemes: ɪf juː hæv ˈɛvɚ bˌɪn fˈɔːɹtʃənət ɪnˈʌf tə fˈaɪnd jɔːɹsˈɛlf mˈaɪnəs ɐ fˈɛɹ sˈaɪzd skˈaɪlaɪt ˌɔn ɐ stˈɔːɹmi nˈaɪt, ænd ðə mˈæn ʌvðə hˈaʊs ɐwˈeɪ ˌɔn ˈɜːdʒənt bˈɪznəs, ænd nˌɑːt ɛkspˈɛktᵻd bˈæk fɚɹə mˈʌnθ, juː wɪl nˈoʊ wʌt maɪ fˈiːlɪŋz wɜː wɛn aɪ hˈɜːd ðə nˈuːz. ɪɾ ɪz jˈuːsləs fɔːɹ mˌiː tə tɹˈaɪ tə dᵻskɹˈaɪb ðˌɛm.