text_original: Our grandfathers swore terribly, and drank deep; but their fun did not commence until after dinner. And they drank, for the most part, the best of ale, and such port wine as is not to be had in these days of free trade (which is only an euphemism for adulteration) and motor cars.
text_transcription: OUR GRANDFATHER SWORE TERRIBLY AND DRANK DEEP BUT THEIR FUN DID NOT COMMENCE UNTIL AFTER DINNER AND THEY DRANK FOR THE MOST PART THE BEST OF ALE AND SUCH PORT WINE AS IS NOT TO BE HAD IN THESE DAYS OF FREE TRADE WHICH IS ONLY A EUPHEMISM FOR ADULTERATION AND MOTOR CARS
phonemes: ˌaʊɚ ɡɹˈændfɑːðɚz swˈɔːɹ tˈɛɹᵻbli, ænd dɹˈæŋk dˈiːp; bˌʌt ðɛɹ fˈʌn dɪdnˌɑːt kəmˈɛns ʌntˈɪl ˈæftɚ dˈɪnɚ. ænd ðeɪ dɹˈæŋk, fɚðə mˈoʊst pˈɑːɹt, ðə bˈɛst ʌv ˈeɪl, ænd sˈʌtʃ pˈɔːɹt wˈaɪn ˌæzˌɪz nˌɑːt təbi hæd ɪn ðiːz dˈeɪz ʌv fɹˈiː tɹˈeɪd (wˌɪtʃ ɪz ˈoʊnli æn jˈuːfəmˌɪzəm fɔːɹ ɐdˌʌltɚɹˈeɪʃən) ænd mˈoʊɾɚ kˈɑːɹz.