text_original: Only the other day I sat down to sort out the bag of tricks as usual, but, if you'll believe me, I couldn't do it Do you thinly I could send every man a different animal? Not me! I sent the same animal to all the lot of 'em; and the queerest part of it is, the beggar won!
text_transcription: ONLY THE OTHER DAY I SAT DOWN TO SORT OUT THE BAG OF TRICKS AS USUAL BUT IF YOU'LL BELIEVE ME I COULDN'T DO IT DO YOU THINK I COULD SEND EVERY MAN A DIFFERENT ANIMAL NOT ME I SENT THE SAME ANIMAL TO ALL THE LOT OF EM AND THE QUEEREST PART OF IT IS THE BEGGAR WON
phonemes: ˈoʊnli ðɪ ˈʌðɚ dˈeɪ aɪ sˈæt dˌaʊn tə sˈɔːɹt ˈaʊt ðə bˈæɡ ʌv tɹˈɪks æz jˈuːʒuːəl, bˌʌt, ɪf juːl bᵻlˈiːv mˌiː, aɪ kˌʊdənt dˈuː ɪt dˈuː juː θˈɪnli aɪ kʊd sˈɛnd ˈɛvɹi mˈæn ɐ dˈɪfɹənt ˈænɪməl? nˌɑːt mˌiː! aɪ sˈɛnt ðə sˈeɪm ˈænɪməl tʊ ˈɔːl ðə lˈɑːt ʌv ˈɛm; ænd ðə kwˈɪɹɪst pˈɑːɹt ʌv ɪɾ ˈɪz, ðə bˈɛɡɚ wˈʌn!