text_original: Perhaps, as I had my tea and clotted cream on the village staircase, I might mention casually to a pretty tourist that I was the author of the book that protruded from her handbag  and fetch my dishes to her table.
text_transcription: PERHAPS AS I HAD MY TEA AND CLOTTED CREAM ON THE VILLAGE STAIRCASE I MIGHT MENTION CASUALLY TO A PRETTY TOURIST THAT I WAS THE AUTHOR OF THE BOOK THAT PROTRUDED FROM HER HAND BAG AND FETCH MY DISHES TO HER TABLE
phonemes: pɚhˈæps, æz aɪ hæd maɪ tˈiː ænd klˈɑːɾᵻd kɹˈiːm ɔnðə vˈɪlɪdʒ stˈɛɹkeɪs, aɪ mˌaɪt mˈɛnʃən kˈæʒuːəli tʊ ɐ pɹˈɪɾi tˈʊɹɹɪst ðæt aɪ wʌzðɪ ˈɔːθɚɹ ʌvðə bˈʊk ðæt pɹətɹˈuːdᵻd fɹʌm hɜː hˈændbæɡ ænd fˈɛtʃ maɪ dˈɪʃᵻz tə hɜː tˈeɪbəl.