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99
spare.txt
76
He reacted as if it were blood.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I can’t remember what punishment we received.
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77
Another clout with the<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">New English Bible?
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78
Detention?
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79
(Often called det.)
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80
A trip class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">make sure I had the right stuff.
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81
For several weeks they poked my body,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">probed my mind.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Drug-free, they concluded.
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They seemed surprised.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Also, videos to the contrary notwithstanding, not a total thicko.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br><...
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83
Bright yellow, fixed wing,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">single prop.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Simple machine, according to my first flight instructor, Serg...
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84
Didn’t look simple to me.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I turned to Booley, studied him.
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85
He wasn’t simple either.
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86
Short, solid,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">tough, he’d fought in Iraq and the Balkans and should’ve been a hard case,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">given all he’d seen and been through, but in fact he seemed...
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87
On the contrary, he was all gentleness.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">He needed to be.
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88
With so much on my mind, I entered our sessions wildly<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">distracted, and it showed.
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89
I kept expecting Booley to lose patience, to begin<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">shouting at me, but he never did.
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90
In fact, after one session, he invited me for<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">a motorbike ride in the country.
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91
Lets go and clear our heads, Lieutenant<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Wales.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">174<spa...
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92
:me/Afghansalarlibrary<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">It worked.
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93
Like a charm.
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94
And the motorbike, a gorgeous Triumph 675,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">was a timely reminder of what I was after in these flight lessons.
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95
Speed and<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">power.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">And freedom.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><s...
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96
On one of our first flights<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">together, with no warning, Booley threw the aircraft into a stall.
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97
I felt the left<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">wing dip, a sickening feeling of disorder, of entropy, and then, after several<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">seconds that felt like decades, he recovered the airc...
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98
What in the absolute—?<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Was this all the options, silence was the least<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">desirable, the least defensibl...
99
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99
We couldn’t just let the press continue to do<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">this to Meg.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Even after I'd convinced him that we neede...
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100
Courtiers blocked us hard.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Nothing can be done, they said.
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101
And therefore nothing wil/ be done.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I accepted this as final.
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102
Until I read an essay in the Huffington Post.
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103
The<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">essayist said the mild reaction of Britons to this explosion of racism was to<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">be expected, since they were the heirs of racist colonialists.
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104
But what was<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">truly “unforgivable,” she added, was my silence.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Mine.<span class="Apple-converted-space...
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105
No more debate, no more discussion.
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106
We needed a statement<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">out there.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Within a day we had a draft.
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107
Strong, precise, angry, honest.
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108
I didn’t<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">think it would be the end, but maybe the beginning of the end.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I read it one last time and a...
99
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109
:me/Afghansalarlibrary<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">UST HOURS BEFORE THAT statement went out, Meg was on her way to see m<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></sp...
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The lounge was full, so an Air Canada representative took<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">pity on her and hid her in a side room.
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111
Even brought her a plate of food.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">By the time she landed at Heathrow my statement was everywhere.
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112
And<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">changing nothing.
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113
The onslaught continued.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">In fact, my statement generated a whole new onslaught—from my<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">family.
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114
Pa and Willy were furious.
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115
They gave me an earful.
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116
My statement<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">made them look bad, they both said.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Why in hell?<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </s...
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117
It was <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Over dinner one night at Highgrove, Pa and I spoke at some length about<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">what I’d been suffering.
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118
I gave him the particulars, told him story after story.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Towards the end of the meal he looked down at his plate and said softly: /<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">suppose it’s my f...
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119
I should’ve got you the help you needed years ago.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I assured him that it wasn’t his fault.
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120
But I appreciated the apology.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">As autumn neared my anxiety was heightened, I think, by my impending<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">b...
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121
Dregs of my youth, I thought.
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122
I was beset<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">by all the traditional doubts and fears, asked myself all the basic questions<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">people ask when they get older.
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123
Who am I?
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Where am I going?
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125
Normal, I<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">told myself, except that the press was abnormally echoing my self-<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">questioning.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p ...
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126
quacks, to try to<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">make sense of it.
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127
Books about me dived into my love life, homed in on each<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">romantic failure and near miss.
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128
I seem to recall one detailing my flirtation<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">with Cameron Diaz.
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129
Harry just couldn’t see himself with her, the author<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">reported.
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Indeed I couldn’t, since we’d never met.
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131
I was never within fifty<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">meters of Ms. Diaz, further proof that if you like reading pure bollocks then<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">royal biographies are just your thing.<span c...
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132
The great controversies about kings and<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">queens, going back centuries, generally centered on whom they married, and<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">whom they didn’t, and the childre...
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133
You<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">weren’t a fully vested member of the Royal Family, indeed a true human<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">being, until you were wed. No coincidence that Granny, head of state in<s...
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134
Stay busy, I told myself as I flew away from Botswana.
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135
In the<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">short while left before you ship to Afghanistan, just stay busy.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">To that end, I went to Lesoth...
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136
We visited several schools<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">built by Sentebale.
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137
Prince Seeiso was with us; he’d co-founded the charity<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">with me back in 2006, shortly after losing his own mother.
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138
(His mother had<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">also been a fighter in the war against HIV.)
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139
He took us to meet scores of<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">children, each with a wrenching story.
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The average life expectancy in<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Lesotho at that time was forty-something, while in Britain it was seventy-<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">nine for men, eighty-two for women.
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141
Being a child in Lesotho was like<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">being middle-aged in Manchester, and while there were various complicated<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">reasons for this, the main one was HIV.<...
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142
Way off.
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143
As a gift Prince Seeiso gave us wild<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">ponies, to ride part of the way, and tribal blankets for the cold.
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144
We wore<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">them as capes.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Our first stop was a frozen village in the clouds: Semonkong.
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145
Some<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">seven thousand feet above sea level, it lay between snow-tipped mountains.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Plumes of warm air spurted from the horses’ noses as we pushed them ...
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146
Shepherd boys would<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">come here twice a week, have a hot meal, go to a class.
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147
We sat in semi-<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">darkness, beside a paraffin lamp, watching a lesson, and then we sat on the<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><b...
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148
:me/Afghansalarlibrary<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">ground with a dozen boys, some as young as eight.
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149
We listened to them<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">describe their daily trek to our school.
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It defied belief: after twelve hours of<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">tending their cattle and sheep, they’d walk for two hours through mountain<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">passes just to learn maths, readi...
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151
Such was their hunger to learn.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">They braved sore feet, bitter cold—and far worse.
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152
They were so vulnerable<span class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">85.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">i NAMIBIA, CROSSING the northern...
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153
They were heavily<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">persecuted in that part of Namibia, because they often encroached on<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">farmland.
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154
The doctor was darting some, to study their health and<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">movements.
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155
He took our number, told us he’d call if he found one.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">That night we made camp by a dry stream.
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156
Everyone else was in tents, in<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">trucks, but I unrolled my mat by the fire and covered myself with a thin<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">blanket.<span class="Apple-converted-space">...
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157
This area is full of lions,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">boss.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I told them I’d be fine.
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158
Done it a million times.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Around midnight the radio buzzed.
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159
The doctor.
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160
He was four kilometers<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">away and he’d just darted two lions.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">We jumped into the Land Cruiser, raced do...
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161
Namibian<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">soldiers assigned to us by the government insisted on coming as well.
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162
As did<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">local police in the area.
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163
Despite the pitch-dark, we found the doctor easily.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">He was standing beside two enormous lions.
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164
Both were lying on their<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">bellies, heads resting heavily on their giant paws.
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165
He aimed his torch.
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166
We<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">could see the lions’ chests rising and falling.
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167
Quiet breathing.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I knelt beside the female, touched her skin, looked at her half-closed<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">amber eyes.
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168
I can’t explain it, and I can’t defend it...but I felt that I knew<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">her.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"...
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:me/Afghansalarlibrary<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">As I stood, one of the Namibian soldiers brushed past me, crouched<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span>...
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A big male.
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171
The soldier held up his AK-47, asked one<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">of his buddies to get a photo.
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172
As if he’d made a kill.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">I was about to say something, but Billy the Rock beat me to it.
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173
He told<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">the Namibian soldier to get the fuck away from the lions.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">Sullen, the soldier slunk away.<spa...
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174
There was a flash.
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175
I turned<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">again, </span></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">time they set it upon her head.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></p> <p class="p3"><span class="s1"></span><br></p> <p class="p2"><span class="s1">It ...